Crave

  Also by Z.L. Arkadie

  His Second Chance with Heiress Bryn Christmas Duet

  Crave

  LOVE in the USA

  Find Her, Keep Her: A Martha's Vineyard Love Story

  There's Something About Her, A Manhattan Love Story

  Say You Love Her: An L.A. Love Story

  Know Her, Love Her: Daisy & Jack, #1

  Still In Love With Her: Maggie & Vince, #1

  Explore Her, More of Her (Daisy & Belmont, #2)

  He's So Bad, A San Francisco Love Story

  Made To Like Her (Maggie & Vince, #2)

  Made To Love Her: Maggie & Vince, #2

  He's So Good: Robert & Carter

  Say You Love Me: Charlie & Angel

  Adore Her, More of Her: Daisy & Jack, #2

  LOVE in the USA, The Hesters

  Once Friends

  Now Lovers, A Hollywood Love Story (Sonja & Jay, #2)

  Taming The Shrewd

  Waiting On You

  Parched

  Parched

  The Seventh Sister

  Quenched

  Ignite

  Vanquish

  Steal With A Kiss

  Parched: Forget Me Never

  Forget Me Never (Pt. I): The Search For A Vampire

  The Dark Billionaire Christmas Trilogy

  Intrigued

  The Dark Billionaire Jasper Christmas

  Desire

  Claimed

  The Freed Billionaire Spencer Christmas Trilogy

  Enthrall

  The Freed Billionaire Spencer Christmas Trilogy

  The Secret Billionaire Asher Christmas Duet

  Seduction

  Embrace

  The Sterlings, Billionaire Family Saga

  Secrets and Lies

  Secrets That Hide

  Secrets That See The Light

  The Secret Keeper

  Standalone

  The Fifth Sister ( A Parched Novel)

  Love in the USA, The Lords (Books 1-3)

  The Sterlings Billionaire Family Saga (Books 1-3)

  The Dark Billionaire Jasper Christmas Trilogy

  Exposed, Boss Billionaire Spencer Christmas

  Watch for more at Z.L. Arkadie’s site.

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter One

  Bryn Christmas

  I sat on a stool at the airport bar, eyes glued to my cell phone screen as I swiped through images of the interior of the next house I’d been paid to design. It was still hard to believe beautifying people’s homes was my profession. I, who had never truly believed I would amount to much beyond being good at spending the family fortune, had found myself a real career. My flight from Newport, Rhode Island, to Denver, Colorado, had been scheduled to take off three hours earlier. The last announcement said I would be boarding soon, though. It was the third of January, and travelers were flying home from wherever they’d spent the holidays, but overnight, torrential weather—the sort that disrupted life on the ground—had sailed in from the north.

  All three of my brothers had tried to convince me to fly on an aircraft from the family fleet, but I preferred traveling commercial. Growing up a member of the Christmas family had been such a lonely existence that I took every opportunity I could to be around people I didn’t know. Plus, I wasn’t as well known as Jasper, Spencer, and Asher. Only on rare occasions was I recognized as “the Christmas heiress.” So far, even in my hometown, no one had requested to take a picture with me or asked if I was indeed Bronwyn Henrietta Christmas. I’d been able to sit at the bar in peace while sipping a martini and getting a lot of work done.

  “I thought that was you,” a man said.

  Keeping my eyes on my phone, I stiffened. I recognized the voice, even though I hadn’t heard it in a long time. Slowly, I turned until Jamison Cox and I were gazing into each other’s eyes.

  “Wow, you.” I was having an out-of-body experience, and the words came out of my mouth by accident.

  Jamison absentmindedly wiped at his mouth. “Well, hi.”

  It was the moment for us to either shake hands or hug. We did neither because I was unable to move. “Hi,” I replied in a flat tone.

  My head felt light as we continued to stare at each other. Soon, I would have to say something. But what? I was looking at someone I thought I’d never see again.

  “What are you doing here?” I unthinkingly asked.

  “How are you?” he asked at the same time.

  We both looked away from each other to chuckle bashfully. I didn’t want to behave like a schoolgirl with a crush on the wrong boy. But that was exactly how I felt. Frankly, I’d never understood my attraction to Jamison Cox. His face was always clean-shaven, and all the hairs on his head were perfectly combed into place. His shirt was still crisp and white, and his slacks were dark and had a crease. As with the last time we’d been together, he carried the scent of fresh laundry and cologne that gave me the same feeling as biting into the sweetest fruit and pausing to let the flavors swell in my mouth. He looked conservative. Randolph, my father, hid behind a conservative appearance. Therefore, I was prone to distrust him and would have never pursued a relationship with him. Until one night, I did.

  My memory flashed me back to the first time I laid eyes on Jamison Cox and how he’d had no effect on me at all. It was roughly eight years earlier at Becca Smith’s wedding. The ceremony took place at a castle nestled against Lake Como in Italy. I was certain that Becca’s parents were in charge of the guest list and I’d been invited because of my last name. Having a Christmas seated on the bride’s side at their daughter’s wedding made for good optics. At first, I declined their invitation by simply tossing it into the trash bin. However, Randolph insisted I go and gave Jasper the job of making sure I followed his orders.

  I shook my head adamantly. “No way.”

  “Bryn, a destination wedding at Lake Como? This is not a battle you want to fight,” Jasper said.

  As usual, his point got through my thick skull, and I flew to Italy to attend Harper Rebecca Callahan Smith’s impending nuptials. On the day of her beautiful and high-priced sunset wedding, she was a no-show. Jamison Cox, the groom, was literally left standing at the altar. I observed him as he waited, and I wondered what was going through his mind. He seemed so relaxed, as if he hadn’t a care in the world. Then Dorothy—Becca’s mother—and one of her sisters approached him and his best man and whispered something to him. Jamison barely nodded and then shrugged before the four of them escaped the scene. I never forgot how indifferent he looked. A groom whose bride was a no-show should have looked angry or upset. I concluded that he was no different than most of us who attended the wedding—empty on the inside and going through the motions. The next time I saw him was at a restaurant in Santa Barbara, California. Jamison was a campaign manager, and my sister-in-law had met with him to ask if he would spearhead my brother’s congressional run for office.

  But there we were again, running into each other randomly at an airport in Rhode Island. “So, it’s true?” he asked.

  I braced myself to look at him again. And when his handsome face filled the frame of my eyesight, my heart raced like a brisk wind. “What’s true?”

  He smirked, flashing straight white teeth—the trademark of a genuine California boy. “You’re the only Christmas who
flies commercial.”

  I looked away from his sultry eyes to break the spell his gaze was putting on me. No, Bryn. Remember what he did. He’s not to be trusted.

  “You look good, though—beautiful, as usual,” he said.

  Damn it. I was forced to gaze into his eyes again. I cleared my throat. “Thank you.” Working hard to remain the picture of calm, I dropped my cell phone on top of the bar. “But I just don’t understand what happened.”

  His eyebrows shot up in surprise. “You mean between us?”

  I could feel my pulse speeding. “Yes, and are we supposed to be talking? After all, your father not only tried to tarnish my family’s reputation but also inferred that I committed a crime. Also, you tried to torpedo my brother’s political campaign, which leaves me wondering, was I part of your plan?” I felt relieved. I'd been wanting to say all of that since the night Spencer informed me of Jamison’s double-dealing.

  Jamison rubbed the back of his neck as he sighed. I didn’t think he realized he did that, because from what I remembered, Jamison intentionally remained the picture of calm whenever he came under fire. That was one of his strengths. However, I’d given him a lot to chew on. I didn’t enjoy being in his face as much as I would have in the past, but it had to be said. My continued recovery depended on me always addressing the pink-polka-dot elephant in the room so that it wouldn’t eventually end up squatting on my chest.

  “No, Bryn, I was never using you. I could never do that,” he finally said. “I apologize for the role I played in the debacle with your brother’s campaign. That sort of divisiveness is not what I’m known for. As for my father, I can’t apologize for him.”

  I unfolded my arms, allowing my cooler head to prevail, and thought of my own controlling and despicable father, who was fortunately dead and buried. “I understand, and I accept your apology.”

  Jamison’s Adam’s apple bobbed. “Thank you.”

  We stared into each other’s eyes again. I didn’t want Jamison Cox to set off fluttering sensations in my chest or make my soul quiver, but he did just that. Suddenly, I felt irritated, and a tiny part of me wanted him to go away already and forget I’d ever existed. But that was a very, very, very small part.

  “So, what are you doing in these parts, anyway?” I asked.

  He looked down at his feet while wearing a sheepish grin. My pinched face gave me a slight headache. He was being cagey, and that was annoying. “You don’t want to tell me?”

  Our gazes met again. “What? Huh?” he asked.

  “You don’t have to tell me. And you don’t have to stall. As a matter of fact—”

  Jamison shoved his hands into his pockets. “So, what have you been up to these days?”

  I paused to study him. Did he hear what I just said? Jamison’s face was red, and his gorgeous eyes seemed a little wild. If I had a mirror, I would probably see that I appeared just as flustered as he had. I felt jittery, and the parts of me that hadn’t tingled in a long time had been activated. It was apparent that we still had strong sexual chemistry, but that could be resolved by putting distance between us. I wouldn’t be making a healthy choice if I got involved for the second time with a man who had loved me and left me. The wisest decision would have been to get as far away from him as possible, but still, I wasn’t ready to leave him just yet, and that worried me.

  “My brother Asher got married this weekend at the family estate,” I said.

  He nodded. “I heard. It was a big deal, wasn’t it?”

  “I don’t know about that, but the day was magical for us. Being that it was a new home and the old memories had been…” I smashed my lips. That was enough talk about me. “What about you? I mean, do you have connections in Rhode Island?”

  Jamison shook his head and pursed his lips.

  His evasiveness annoyed me. “You can’t tell me because you’re doing your father’s bidding, I presume.” That was prickly, and I immediately wanted to take back those words.

  A cynical sniff accompanied Jamison’s smirk. “No.” He licked his kissable lips, and gosh, it was so sexy. Get a grip, Bronwyn Henrietta Christmas. Get ahold of yourself.

  “Visiting a girlfriend?” I asked. Damn it, I am on a roll.

  He shook his head and, after a two-beat pause, said, “No.”

  Bingo. I’d hit the nail on the head. “So, you do have a girlfriend, then?”

  His eyebrows furrowed. “Did I say I had a girlfriend? I don’t think I do.”

  “Well, you’re not referring to her as a ‘girlfriend.’ But you’ve flown all this way to be with her, so she may believe you’re her boyfriend.”

  Jamison tossed his head back and laughed. “I see you’re still creative.”

  “Am I wrong?”

  “You’re wrong.”

  “About which part?”

  Our gazes locked. It was as if the chatter, glasses clinking, and voices calling flight numbers over the loudspeaker had faded to silence. I felt my chest rise and fall with each breath. Shit. His nearness was slaying my heart, and I couldn’t stop it from happening if I stayed in his presence for too long.

  “Bryn.” His whisper echoed so loudly in my ears. “Again, I’m sorry.”

  I opened my mouth then closed it. I couldn’t speak, because if I did, my heart would betray my head. But I did appreciate his sincerity. I was sorry, too, but I was too choked up to say it.

  Then I heard, “Flight 3345 to Denver, Colorado, is now boarding.”

  “That’s me.” My tight throat made my words come out strained.

  “You live in Denver?”

  I eased off the stool, and then we were standing close enough that the strong connection between us completely overwhelmed me. “No,” I barely said. “I have a client.”

  His eyebrows flew up and stayed there. “A client?”

  I nodded gently. “Yes.”

  “What are you doing these days?”

  My lips wanted his, and I could sense that his wanted mine. But I wished I’d never run into Jamison Cox, because there could be no future for us as a couple. It was apparent that he was still working for his father, Boomer, who was a bad man and a foe of my family. I couldn’t be stupid. Jamison’s father would have been happy if my brother and I had gone to prison for something we hadn’t done. To Boomer, that would have been a win. But was that the real reason I was afraid to let my heart get attached to him again? I didn’t know.

  “Good seeing you. Take care of yourself, Jamison.” I quickly turned my back on him and walked away as fast as I could, trying not to run.

  “Bryn?” he called.

  I wanted my feet to keep shuffling, but they stopped and turned me around. We stared at each other. Why do I want to cry? Why does my heart feel shattered by him for a second time?

  He rubbed the back of his neck. “See you around.”

  See me around? He would never see me again. I would make sure of that. So without another word, I turned my back on Jamison Cox and finished making my escape.

  Chapter Two

  Bryn Christmas

  The airplane soared steadily through the sky after a bumpy start. I was seated next to a girl who was about eleven or twelve years old. The last time her cell phone had been out of her hands was right before takeoff. She had sat her device on top of the bin between our seats to scarf down two complimentary preflight hot chocolate chip cookies. Once we reached cruising altitude, her eyes were fixed on the screen. I loved sitting next to kids on airplanes, but she was obviously not in the mood for conversation, so I sparked up my laptop, hooked into the secure onboard network, and tried to do some work. Unfortunately, I couldn’t shake thoughts of Jamison Cox. It was strange how being in his presence was like being swaddled in a warm, soft blanket. I let the possibility of us being soul mates sit in my mind just so that I could deconstruct it.

  After Jamison had been exposed as a conspirator against my brother’s political campaign, he never got in touch with me. Granted, I’d lost my cell phone while vacationing
in Borneo, but I still had email, and the address was on the contact sheet. My ex-boyfriend, Dale Rumor, had torched my heart by being a selfish prick. But although I’d been with Dale longer, the break between me and Jamison hurt more.

  Jamison was supposed to be the good guy, my first healthy pick. And that one night he and I spent together had been out-of-this-world amazing. I’d put a lot of effort into trying to forget the details of our lovemaking. My breasts tingled as I recalled how his wet, warm tongue rubbed the tips of my nipples. Jamison wasn’t an overeager or coarse lover. His mouth, body, and movements had been soft and sensual. I recalled how he savored his way down from my mouth to my ribs then sank his tongue into my belly button. My back had curled, my body tense with novel sexual pleasure, and I nearly fainted when his wet, warm mouth devoured my pussy, bringing me to the most potent orgasm I’d ever experienced. Dale hadn’t known how to eat pussy. Jamison had.

  Gosh, he was good in bed. Or maybe it was our chemistry that took our lovemaking to a level that was beyond our universe. Sexual attraction wasn’t our only bond, though we weren’t an obvious match. I was carefree, and he was conservative, at least in appearance. Our connection was emotional. On the one and only night we made love, when he wasn’t inside me, we lay shoulder to shoulder and talked.

  “What makes you tick?” he asked. “I’ve been trying to figure that out from the day we met.”

  I chuckled, feeling buoyant. “Are you referring to the day we formally met?”

  “When did we informally meet?”

  “On your wedding day.” Then I twisted my mouth thoughtfully. “I guess I met you. You didn’t meet me.”

  He chortled. “Then yes, I meant when we met at the restaurant, which might be the best day of my life.”